Joan: Do you even listen to music?
Grace: Nothing legal.
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(Kevin pulls Joan down to sit on his legs in his wheelchair.)
Joan: (laughing) That's old.
Kevin: You love it.
(Kevin wheels her out of the room)
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Kevin: You're in good shape.
Rebecca: You can't make fun of my Pilates classes anymore.
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Little Girl (God): Come on, I'll walk you home.
(Joan and Little Girl (God) walk away hand in hand.
Joan: Great, I'm being escorted home by a six-year-old.
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Little Girl (God): Everyone has a part of themselves they don't like, Joan. You carry it around like a weight. The lucky ones realize that when it becomes too heavy, you can choose to set it down. That's when you can see things the way they really are.
|
Luke: (to Kevin, angrily) Do you have any idea how much I hated you for shoving me and hitting me and making fun of me all the time. And no one would say anything about it because you were the big star and I was just a geek. You know after your accident, when I heard you would never walk again, I was happy.
|
Joan: Iris, this is Grace. Grace has been Adam's best friend since preschool. You've probably seen him in his tightie whities, haven't you?
(Grace smirks slightly and nods)
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Joan: (seeing her parents kiss) Eh! Come on! Come on, I'm eating here, okay? I thought we established the kitchen as a no PDA zone!
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Hippie Dog Walker (God): I work in mysterious ways, Joan. It's my thing.
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Joan: Okay, we're all going to get in line so you can all smash your artwork.
|
Joan: Please don't make me cancel on Adam. I can't stand him hating me again. It'd be like being in some Russian goulash.
Little Girl (God): Gulag.
|
Grace: How will understanding boiling points improve our lives? Will it help us boil things faster? Will it make us appreciate the virtues of boiled food? Or is it just a useless academic exercise in the pursuit of a useless high school degree?
|
Grace: What's up with Rove and Cousin Itt?
Joan: You don't like her?
Grace: Look, there's a few of us. We talk to one another. I don't want to have to talk to anyone else.
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Grace: Shut up, Friedman.
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(Luke and Kevin have just had a fight, and Joan arrives)
Joan: (happily) Let's stop and get Slurpies!
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Grace: (to Joan; about Iris) Kill it, Girardi!
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Joan: You didn't answer my question.
Concession Stand (God): I don't answer questions, sweetpea. And this you know.
Joan: But I gave you a dollar!
|
Ms. Lischak: And as the liquid heats, the molecules vibrate, furiously pounding into each other until suddenly they can't stand it anymore and what? What? What do they do?
|
Joan: What, Luke, the physics of basketball doesn't interest you?
Luke: The only interesting thing about the physics of basketball is how time and space combine to create a phenomenon known as Luke's departure.
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Joan: Work with children? What, like in a sweatshop?
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Luke: I have an extremely satisfying relationship with someone, both intellectually, as well as physically.
Kevin: Is this with somebody you don't have to inflate?
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Joan: (to Little Girl (God)) You're in charge until I get back.
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Helen: So...Luke.
Will: Yup. He overslept again.
Helen: Maybe our genius is morphing into a teenager. Not another one.
Will: I wanted to stop at two.
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Friedman: Luke Girardi choking in chem class. It was like seeing Einstein forget the speed of light.
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Luke: Okay, I'm late.
Will: So, how about your big brother last night, huh?
Luke: Awesome.
Kevin: How do you know, geek? You left after 2 minutes.
Luke: Yes, to participate in that rarest of high-school rituals, the pursuit of knowledge. (to Joan) You might want to try it sometime.
Joan: Hey, what's with attacking the bystander?
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