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Series 2 |
| 11 :02x01 - Series 2, Episode 1 (May/11/2003) |
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On spanking new Top Gear, we gained one presenter, Richard Hammond was in a V8 tumble drier and we turned up the heat on the world's dullest car.
But first, we saw Volkswagen's Beetle Cabrio, Ford's new StreetKa and the new Smart Roadster. Jeremy drove it, and he was impressed. Kind of...
We introduced the Love/Hate Board. Actually, it was more the 'hate' stuff we're interested in. Pinned up so far are cyclists (not those who pedal through necessity, just those who squeak along to prove some misguided political point), caravans and people who sit too far back in their driving seats in an effort to look 'cool'.
Talking of caravans, we decided to set fire to one with a jet car, just to prove how much we hate them. We also fried Britain's dullest car, a late-1980s Nissan Sunny.
Our first star in a reasonably priced car for series two was Vinnie Jones - ex-footballing tough chap who's since made it big in Hollywood. His lap of our circuit was a surprisingly controlled one, which earned him a respectable laptime result of 1.53.
We also gained a new presenter, James May. He joined us not only to help with the news and new car tests, but also to bring some hot car buying tips for those with more sense than money.
The final gem in our Top Gear bunker was a sparkling Ferrari 355 - not. It may have looked like the real thing, but really it was a dressed up Toyota MR2.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode1.s | | Guest Stars: Vinnie Jones as Himself | | | |
| 12 :02x02 - Series 2, Episode 2 (May/18/2003) |
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On luxury Top Gear, a car fit for a Queen, a German sledgehammer in a velvet bag and we found the fastest politician.
Running with the luxury theme, we looked at the new Rolls Royce Phantom. It's huge, and Jeremy reckoned it's the best car on sale. We also found a real piece of British luxury for a bargain price. It's so good even the Queen has one, and she drives it. It's the classic Rover P5.
Recently, the turnout to local elections has been dismal. So we thought we'd decide the next set of elections with a MG ZR rally car and our track. We plonked a couple of politicians behind the wheel, and told them whoever won would have Top Gear's vote in the next election. Unfortunatly, it was the Liberal Democrat who won, so we had to renage on the deal a bit.
Right, the Hate Board. Jeremy added those people who sit too close to the wheel (mainly female) and those who sit far away (mainly young male) to the board. Horses also made another appearance, alongside car interiors.
The star in our reasonably priced car was celeb chef Jamie Oliver. His laptime was an impressive 1.50, but we also persuaded him to prepare a salad in the back of his trademark VW camper van, which was being driven by Stig.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode2.s | | Guest Stars: Jamie Oliver as Himself | | | |
| 13 :02x03 - Series 2, Episode 3 (May/25/2003) |
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Top Gear saluted the bad car and proved that even now, you can spend money on a load of old rubbish. There was a Starsky in our reasonably priced Hutch, and we took on the finest supercars from around the globe with a £300 Jag.
Next, bad cars. We used to rely on Wartburgs and Polski-Fiats, but now we have the Audi A2, a car that's too tall, has narrow windows and shakes when you switch on the wipers. Then there's the Ford Fusion, based on a Fiesta, but you pay that bit more to sit a bit higher. We could go on, but there's no need - Richard has. He drove the new Lexus SC430 and didn't much like the styling. In fact, he was so unimpressed with the coupé that he'd rather drive Hyundai's new contender.
We decided to find out which country makes the fastest supercar. We should point out, though, that Britain's entry was our very own XJS. But it did have a trick up its sleeve which led it to beat a Ferrari. Namely nitrous oxide, which we'll admit is a bit of a cheat on our part.
Now, what happens when you slot an American '70s cop show hero into our Liana? He breaks it, that's what. And would you believe he could do it twice? Well, he did. David Soul was our star in a reasonably priced car, and he owes us two Lianas.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode3.s | | Guest Stars: David Soul as Himself | | | |
| 14 :02x04 - Series 2, Episode 4 (Jun/01/2003) |
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Top Gear pounced into action with a Jaguar-themed show. An MP tried out our reasonably priced Liana and everyone drove a Jaguar, or two.
Tory MP Boris Johnson - a man perhaps more famous for his appearances on topical TV quiz show Have I Got News For You than his political work, drove our reasonably priced Liana. His laptime was an unremarkable 1.56, although we're sure he'll spin that to be a good thing. Something about road safety probably.
Jeremy tested the new XJ. The looks haven't changed much, but it's all new underneath - and much better for it. So much better, in fact, that Jeremy kept driving until he ran out of road.
Finally, another Jaguar. We managed to get our hands on a one-off special called the XKR-R. It's a tuned XK with racing suspension, seats, a roll bar and even a stash spot for your helmet. It's a cracking motor that really works, thanks to completely redesigned rear suspension and a limited-slip differential that's more than helpful if you want to step the back end out. Oh, and it does 58mph in first gear.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode4.s | | Guest Stars: Boris Johnson as Himself | | | |
| 15 :02x05 - Series 2, Episode 5 (Jun/08/2003) |
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On Top Gear's man-sized blast from the past, James pondered the cabrio question and we discovered which takes longer to change, a gearbox or a woman's outfit?
Anne Robinson was our star who drove the Liana around the track and proved a welcome antidote to a testosterone-fuelled show and, thankfully, she even drove like a girl and a got a laptime of 1.57.
Next, James asked the question: "Are soft-tops really girl's cars or can a bloke get away with driving one?" If you own a StreetKa, the answer's 'no', but if you're brave enough to buy a Triumph TR6 it's an entirely different story.
Staying with the subject of girlieness for a minute - could a bunch of Pirelli girls get ready for a night out faster than Ford's rally team could change most of the running gear on a WRC Focus? Initially we thought that pitting them against a gearbox change might be a little to close to call. What we forgot was that universes have been created and destroyed in less time than it takes four beautiful women to get ready.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode5.s | | Guest Stars: Anne Robinson as Herself | | | |
| 16 :02x06 - Series 2, Episode 6 (Jun/15/2003) |
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On speed-demon Top Gear, the 'driving God' does a track day and we tried to set a new land speed record.
Firstly, Jeremy drove the Mitsubishi Evo 8 and the Subaru Impreza in Scotland. He prefered the Subaru, in case you were wondering.
One or two rungs down the performance ladder and a fraction more insurable is the new 206 GTi 180. The question everyone asks when Peugeot launches a hot hatch is can it do justice to the iconic 205 GTi? Richard concluded that yes, the 206 wouldn't bring shame on its lineage. Although it probably would break down quite a bit.
Richard drove the king of track cars, the Palmer-Jaguar. He loved it, and so would you. And he recommends booking a track day if you really want to explore driving fast, with minimal repercussions.
We decided it was time new boy James was properly tested, so we set him the task of breaking the land speed record, while towing a caravan. Regretably, we blew the car up trying, and had to resort to dropping it from a crane instead. Still, at least the caravan was destroyed.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode6.s | | Guest Stars: Richard Whiteley as Himself | | | |
| 17 :02x07 - Series 2, Episode 7 (Jun/22/2003) |
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On safety-concious Top Gear, we had a man behaving badly (while obeying the rules of the road) in our reasonably priced car, and lots of safe and responsible stuff.
It's been brought to our attention that we're a bit gung-ho, perhaps irresponsible. Frankly we're a bit confused by this, but we thought we'd redress the balance and dedicate an entire show to safety. So, Richard tested the safest family car you can buy, the Renault Megane. And he tested it by crashing into another car. It really was very safe indeed, killing absolutley nobody, which will keep the insurance premium down.
If you're talking safety, you automatically think Sweden. After all, they gave us Saabs and Volvos favoured by safety-concious people the world over. And now the super-safe Swedes have come up with a new supercar called Koenigsegg. Fast and no doubt very safe too.
Cheerfully continuing his blatent disregard for this week's safety theme, Jeremy also introduced a brand new Aston Martin V8 coupe to the world. The whole Top Gear team's pretty much agreed it's about the best looking car that's been launched for a long time.
Finally, the star in a reasonably priced car was a man who used to behave badly, Neil Morrissey. A bit of discipline paid off on the track with a decent laptime of 1.49.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode7.s | | Guest Stars: Neil Morrissey as Himself | | | |
| 18 :02x08 - Series 2, Episode 8 (Jul/06/2003) |
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On fun-filled Top Gear, Richard and James enjoyed life under canvas, an Alfa Romeo waved its arms about a lot, and Darth Vader took on the fiercest evil in the known universe.
Did you know that the British buy more convertibles than the French, the Spanish and the Italians combined? Well, we were a bit surprised as well. Richard and James took them on a typical British summer holiday to decide if we really are all mad.
Our star in the reasonably priced Liana was supermodel Jodie Kidd, who, apart from being impossibly tall and rather pleasing to the eye, has taken part in the odd motorsport event. She managed a fantastic, Jay-Kay-beating time of 1.48.
Now, have you ever wondered who's the fastest Master of the Universe? We did, and thankfully BBC Health and Safety let us invite, among others, Darth Vader and Ming The Merciless to our test track to find out. Luck was on our side, and the evil masters didn't destroy our feeble universe (or Liana), although the DALEKS had a go. It was the Cyberman who got the top laptime.
Finally, Alfa Romeo joined the hot hatch race, and totally blew away the opposition. The 250bhp 147 GTA easily dealt with the VW Golf R32 and Ford Focus RS in our straight-line burn-out, but, as Jeremy discovered, that doesn't necessarily make it the best car. The main problem with these cars has to be the depreciation.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode8.s | | Guest Stars: Jodie Kidd as Herself | | | |
| 19 :02x09 - Series 2, Episode 9 (Jul/13/2003) |
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On high-tech Top Gear, we got a glimpse of the future of car design, Captain Jean Luc Picard flew by at warp factor 0.0001, and we looked at the new Vauxhall family car.
As we're sure you're all aware by now, we have a track at the Top Gear base which we use to test all the really quick stuff. This time it was the S60R from Volvo. Volvo claims this is an M3 beater, but we weren't so sure. Yes, it's nice inside, but it's not terribly quick.
Also in the studio was Mazda's new RX-8, literally straight off the plane from Japan. It's the successor to the RX-7, which was possibly the best looking car ever.
James went to Germany to drive an gadget-filled American car that runs on air. The Hywire's the most high-tech vehicle ever. Not least because it doesn't have a conventional engine, or a gearbox or even an accelerator. But it's hydrogen power plant could change the way we buy cars forever. And it's green too, pushing just steam out of its exhaust pipe.
Our guest in the reasonably priced car was Patrick Stewart from Star Trek. Patrick had a good go at commanding the Liana to go quickly, but it wasn't to be He did however, manage a reasonable 1.50, the same as Jeremy.
Finally, a new family car from Vauxhall called the Signum. A Vauxhall with a difference, it's a car for a back-seat driver. And Jeremy proved this, by driving it from the back. But don't tell Vauxhall, they'd be a bit upset...
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode9.s | | Guest Stars: Patrick Stewart as Himself | | | |
| 20 :02x10 - Series 2, Episode 10 (Jul/20/2003) |
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On low-volume-plastic-bodied-British-sports-cars Top Gear, Jeremy and Richard battled it out to find the best shed-built supercar in the UK, James took a look at a truly enormous Cadillac and comedian, actor and all-round nice chap Alan Davies got to grips with was our reasonably priced car.
Hammond looked at the TVR 350C, which is yet another hairy-chested, plastic missile from the maverick, Blackpool-based manufacturer. It was pretty hard finding another car that could keep up, so in the end we didn't bother and raced it against a Harrier Jump-Jet instead.
Jeremy prefers his plastic, British sports cars with the engine in the middle and therefore championed the new Noble. Richard wasn't convinced, so they tried to settle the argument with a typically mature game of Top Trumps.
As a final decider, both cars were handed over to Top Gear's tame racing driver, the Stig, for a flying lap round our test track. The times were very close, but in the end the Noble managed a faster and much tidier lap. Jeremy, as always, was magnanimous in victory and repeatedly called Hammond a loser while doing a little dance.
Later in the programme, Jeremy tested the astonishing new Phaeton, which is Volkswagen's first foray into the world of high-end luxury saloons. He revealed that VW's MD gave the Phaeton's designers a number of extraordinary rules for the car, including one that states the windows must never become fogged up with condensation. Jeremy immediately took this as a challenge and disappeared into the Phaetons capacious rear with a young lady to make things steamy. Before you all go running to Points of View, we should explain that all Clarkson did was boil a kettle and make a nice cup of tea for his new lady friend.
Keeping with the luxury car theme, James May looked at the jaw-dropping new Cadillac 16 concept. A car with a bonnet long enough to compensate for even the smallest, erm, ego.
Source: http://www.bbc.co.uk/topgear/show/episodes/series2episode10. | | | |
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