Ben: Hey, don't mock me, okay. History Channel dots are a great way to break the ice with the ladies.
|
Sam: Maybe you guys should cover the other exit.
Sock: Cover the exit with what? Our spines?
|
The Devil: Well, I'll try to watch your back, buddy. But you know, you got to remember I'm a busy guy. It's an election year.
|
Sock: This is so unfair. I am not her brother. I mean, I don't even look like her. Why does she insist on labeling me as her brother. I just want her to see me the way the rest of the world does.
Sam: And how is that?
Sock: As a sexual magician.
|
Sam: I almost got my throat ripped out last night!
Gladys: Drama queen.
Sam: You sent a demon to my house to kill me. Why would you do that?
Gladys: We're in a book club together.
Sam: What, so you agreed to have me assassinated?
Gladys: These book clubs are a lot of pressure.
|
Andi: Ooh. We could go on vacation.
Sam: Yes, like a real vacation. Paris.
Andi: We could go to Malta.
Sam: I don't even know where that is!
|
Andi: Alan will talk to me.
Sam: Why?
Andi: Because when I want something, I can be really persistent. And I really really want to go to Malta.
|
Sock: Sam! Listen. Here's what we're going to do. We need to get our stories straight, okay. People are going to come here, they're going to ask questions. We have to have answers ready.
Sam: But our friend is dead!
Sock: Ben would want us to have a cover-up story for the cops and that is a fact, Sam.
|
Sock: It's just, you know, you fought a demon and you're totally fine. It's just odd, that's odd.
Ben: What, you don't believe me?
Sock: Who knows. Maybe you're not lying.
|
Sock: Your ladyhood is a very very special thing. It's like a... you know, it's like a super awesome hot tub. And if you just let anybody hop into that tub, it becomes meaningless. It becomes filled with hair and you have to clean it out all the time.
Kristen: I hate dirty hot tubs.
Sock: We all do.
|
NL (
UK (
Digg
Furl
Del.icio.us
Google